So, a new anime came out on October 6th called Keijo!!!!!!!!, and no, I have no idea why there are so many explanation points there. To sum everything up, girls in swimsuits are fighting each other on floating platforms using only their butts and boobs to fight. The concept of butt-battles has been around for a while, mostly popularized by Dead or Alive Extreme Beach Volleyball. I honestly see it no differently than as I do weird Japanese game shows.

After watching the first episode, I got a serious Beyblade vibe from the show. I wouldn’t be surprised if teams show up later that are all themed “Tropical Rain Fish” or something like later in the show. The anime opens with Kaminashi Nozomi and Sayaka Miyata watching the finals of a Keijo tournament and finding it to be rather intense and interesting, so, like in all anime sports-combat shows, they decide to join the sport professionally when they go off to their new school. So if you’ve ever seen a season of Yu-Gi-Oh, Cardfight! Vanguard or Beyblade, then you know the set up already.

The way of combat in this anime is for the women (because men aren’t allowed) to use their boobs or their butts to slam against each other to either knock their opponents out or into the water, only your feet can touch the platform, the rest of your body, save for your face, is illegal to use to touch any part of your opponent.

And why do I say face, well…

Headbutt, you're... Doing it right?

Headbutt, you’re… Doing it right?

Obviously, you can’t strike your opponent with your face and using your arms is very limited, and there’s lots of insanity to come later, that much I know for sure. Despite the fact that I do enjoy a good fan service romp, I’m not a fan of pure fan service anime. Anime that has mostly a plot with some fan service thrown in is more enjoyable to me, such as the classic series “Outlaw Star”.

I won’t say Keijo is trash though, it has its place at least, and the characters aren’t just vapid idiots at least. Nozumi, who has long, dark hair, wants to get into the sport to become rich, Miyata, who has short, white hair, wants to join because if she does well she can get someone to design a personalized swimsuit for her.

Obviously not the greatest reasons, but whatever, at least they’re actual goals, unlike some shonen anime heroes. So, after that introduction, the girls are shifted off to college with the press there to talk to the amazing up-and comers. Nozumi, sadly, can’t get anyone to talk to her for long and the one reporter who does talk to her is pulled away being told to talk to the more interesting girls, such as Miyata. After two years of #GamerGate, that is 100% accurate.

Well, thankfully for Nozumi, she has two girls who are considered up-and-coming super stars in Keijo talk to her, first is Kawai Hanabi, a pink haired girl, and Kusakai Mio, a blonde biker girl who’s twenty years old and reminds me of Hayate Yagami from Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha and Katsuragi from Senran Kagura.

Don’t know what I mean, well, here’s how Mio introduces herself to Nozumi:

keijo mio

Meet Mio.

keijo mio babe watch

This is spoken in heavily-accented English.

keijo mio booty time

Her hobby is having fun with cute girls (well, that’s one way to introduce yourself).

While everyone stands and stares for a brief moment while Mio gets quite a few gropes in, the scene is played for laughs, though I imagine if Mio were male that some comeuppance would have headed Mio’s way. Anyway, Kawai Hanabi’s introduction was pretty normal, but then we get a flashback to six months ago, and we see how Hanabi and Nozumi met. And her introduction, well… No beating around the bush, this girl is SCARY!

keijo kawai hanabi

Meet Kawai Hanabi, normal enough, right?

keijo kawai hanabi scary

Now she’s starting to scare me, nice boobs though.

keijo kawai hanabi death awaits

OH MY GOD! SHE’S STARING INTO MY SOUL!!!

keijo kawai hanabi pure terror

No less terrifying

Meanwhile, while this is happening, Miyata is having a fight with another girl and pulls THIS trick off.

For those who need subs, the girl who is attacking Miyata is going “with those tiny tits. You can’t possibly, wait, what?!” when Miyata’s chest seemingly grows, when she’s knocked away, she goes “is… Is that a butt that looks like a giant pair of boobs?” Speaking of tricks, this is how Nozumi starts her fight…

Well, after the flashback, both Nozumi and Miyata are sent to their brand-new room, room 230, which has a reputation of being the room where drop-outs are sent to. When they arrive, they meet their new roommates, Toyoguchi Non, who’s a total klutz and has a thick Kansai accent. If you don’t know what it’s like for English speakers, think people from Georgia, Texas or Louisana, it’s kind of hard to understand for those who don’t have the dialect normally.

The other girl is Aoba Kazane, who seems to be a total recluse, or at least an avid book reader, as she doesn’t respond to anything Miyata, Nozumi or Non say to her, though her hair twitches a lot. Well, I can’t say for sure, but I’m sure that’s a character trait of hers. There was something that bothered me throughout the episode though…

I mean, how did Hanabi get her butt up to hit some of the girls in the head so fast that she could barely be seen? It wasn’t like they were crouching too often, and the girls were just as tall as she was, so how’d she get her butt up that high?

Any ways, Is Keijo enjoyable? Yeah, you can enjoy it, but it´s not my personal cup of tea. I mean, I do enjoy the fan service for what it is and how absolutely absurd it is. Either way, at least I can give the design team some credit. The girls look like they could actually be real, especially their coach, Ujibe Nagisa, the Siren. Nozumi took one look at her and went “that’s not a siren. She’s a seal!” due to how short and fat she was (no, I’m not linking that image, bleah!).

So, if you can enjoy fan service, butts slamming into each other, boobs bopping around, parody attacks such as the “Butt of Bablyon” (that will happen later), hard nipples being used to tear off the swimsuits of the competition (Miyata does that later, I guess doing Judo helps a lot), then you might find some enjoyment in Keijo!!!!! Sadly, not everyone can find enjoyment in a fanservice-laden show. I mean, seriously, it’s not like it’s trying to be Attack on Titan, Kill La Kill, Neon Genesis Evengelion, GaoGaiGar or the like. It’s just trying to be silly and fun. However, of course, Kotaku (the buzz-kills that they are) had to write a negative article on the subject (as seen in the picture down below).

It doesn’t talk about the anime at all and just complains about the fan service completely. There was a line though, that makes me have to address it:

“What I don’t understand is why, despite cultural differences, American anime fans see Keijo!!!!!!!! and laugh it off, unmoved that, in this show, women are valued at the sum total of their body parts.”

kotaku vs keijo

So I take that Kotaku´s logic is “When I/we don´t like something then no one else should be able to enjoy it!”?

old school anime fan service

Fan service has existed in anime since the dawn of time. So Kotaku is late to “anti-fan service train”.

Because, Cecilia D’Anastasio (staff writer for Kotaku), you fun-hating person, American anime fans understand it’s just for fun, not serious and two, well, I guess you never watch competitive gymnastics or other sports, do you? People aren’t valued for who they are when they play, but for what they can do for your team or in the competition, exceptions are for the ones who are the best.

anime feminist

Good luck with that one, the SJWs will have a zero chance in hell winning that battle.

And by the way, Cecilia, in the manga, Nozumi was a gymnast in high school but rightfully pointed out that if she got injured while doing gymnastics, her career would be over. Furthermore, she also stated that trying to make a living while doing gymnastics is absurdly hard…And at the end of your likely short career. You aren’t making any more money and have to have other skills to live. Honestly, even though Nozumi speaks in a fairly rough manner, she knows more about how the world works than most of Kotaku’s staff, that’s for sure.

And with that said, what´s your take on this matter? Let us know your thoughts in the comment section down below!

Sources:
Kotaku
Raging Golden Eagle

Credit:
Robin Ek – Editor

***Disclaimer***
This is a personal opinion of the writer, and it doesn’t necessarily represent the other writers (nor The Gaming Ground´s) opinions.

***Disclosure***
I´m not a fan of Kotaku.

tgg author avatar Phil Weigel
Phil Weigel
The Gaming Ground
Twitter: @SilverScarCat

More by Phil Weigel:

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